I’ve been threatening to write this post for a while and I’ve finally found the time and made the decision to do so. If you know me or have read some of my recent posts you’ll know I’ve not been too happy at work (not baking, my other job) which I’ve felt has had an effect on my mood and anxiety levels lately.
Back in April I had a meltdown (yes, I’m sure that’s the clinical name) whilst driving to work, panic attack, anxiety attack, I don’t know what it was but I pulled over and cried and hyper ventilated for almost three quarters of an hour. I wanted to drive away from everything, but it wasn’t everything that was the problem. It was my job. I’m not going to go into detail about my job as that’s neither here nor there but the affect it had on me physiologically was immense. I’d felt for months this dark cloud come over me every Sunday night, I’d turn in to this vile person that didn’t care to be spoken to or want to engage in any kind of conversation about work. I’d come home Monday night and shrug off questions about my day as I didn’t want to spend a minute longer thinking about it. I’d lie awake at night feeling anxious, under pressure and worried. This feeling went on for months and months. As you can imagine, our household wasn’t a barrel of laughs during the week.
In the meantime, whilst pretending the week didn’t exist, I had been baking the odd cake for people here and there and slowly making the foundations for a business. Since April 2014 the ‘business’ has suddenly found its feet and people seem to have discovered me. Instead of getting 2-3 enquiries every month or so, I’m now getting them every other day or so. I’ve met brides for wedding cake consultations and have delivered cakes which have received amazing feedback. I’m a bit shocked that I’ve managed to get to this point after all this is me we’re talking about – the person who rarely sticks out anything. Hubby even makes a joke out of all my ‘fads’. I’ve got my little sheets charting my income and expenses, I have a forecast of income for the next 12 months and money in my business bank account. I’ve finally reached a point whereby I pay for business purchases with income I’ve made and it’s a wonderful feeling.
So, with all that in mind, we have taken the decision that I shall resign from my ‘day job’ to concentrate on my cake business full time. It’s a bit scary but my stress and mood has changed drastically which I am sure hubby will vouch for. I don’t finish said day job until December but knowing the end is in sight is enough. Of course, things have had to change a bit – we’re not millionaires (yet) and Florence’s’ nursery costs nigh on £900 per month! So, we’re reducing her sessions down to compensate a little of what I am losing in earnings. It’s going to be tough to find time around a toddler to bake and decorate cakes to my standards, I know this and I’m preparing myself for it. Florence will get her 15hrs free childcare come next September so that will help no end and of course a year later she will be off to big school. BUT! We are also trying for another baby. Crazy I know, but we want another and will make it work one way or another. Perhaps Mother Nature has other plans for us hence why we haven’t conceived yet, perhaps she knows I’m going to be uber successful and need all the time I can get to bake and decorate (fingers crossed). Either way we’ll carry on trying and cross bridges as we come to them.
So there, that’s an update on me and my life in 685 words. It all sounds a bit crazy written down but ‘YOLO’ – so let’s make the most of it and follow our dreams while we’re still here.
You can visit my business page Cotswold Cupcakes too if you like